Life is so interesting. I feel like I go to work, come home, go to bed, rinse and repeat. Yet after a large absence from this blog, I find myself not knowing where to begin. Much has happened. Much is happening. I am getting married. It's a busy time right now--blending two households of stuff, building new relationships with children and grandchildren, prioritizing time differently, planning a wedding, and adding all that on top of an already full life.
This blog has been and will continue to be my weight loss journey. My destination of a healthy weight and lifestyle hasn't changed.
I've enrolled in an online Women Food and God retreat. The book is remarkable, and the course brings it alive. I am learning about myself, my beliefs about my body and worth, and my relationship with food. I am immersing myself in the courses and reviewing the materials daily.
At its essence Geneen Roth's retreat is designed to reconnect us with our bodies. Each session begins with a guided meditation, then deals with a different topic. I'm familiar with the course material because I've read the book, but I'm experiencing it this time instead of reading it from an outside perspective.
Bits of Bonnie T
The ramblings of a way-too-happy lady.
Monday, June 23, 2014
Monday, January 20, 2014
My New Year's Resolution
2014: Bonnie's Year of Cheer. That's my resolution, my theme for the year. I am choosing to be cheerful. What a happy goal!
Here's my cheerful story for the week. After a lovely but tiring week in Houston for work, I was queuing up for the flight home when one of my co-workers said he'd been updgraded to First Class and offered me his seat! Who does that? My friend Derek.
In other news, I'm not cut out for diet pills. I tried Phentermine for about a month and a half and, to be honest, I'd rather be fat and happy than feel sick all the time. Not stomach sick, but kind of sinus pressure-y-just-not-myself sick. I may try to use it on the weekends only and see how I feel. My diet plan is to be sensible, eat right, and be moderate. Easier to write than to do.
My newest knee was nearly ready to exercise, then I took a little tumble at Leadership in Houston earlier this month. Picture this: I had taken about five steps into the hallway outside of my hotel room when my shoe caught on the carpet and I pitched forward. I did one of those take-a-few-more-steps dances, then landed face first like I was sliding into home. No one was in the hall, so I tried to stand up before anyone saw me. At that point I realized I wasn't going to be able to stand without some sort of support, so I rolled to a stranger's door and grabbed it to pull myself up. The door handle sure jiggled--I was relieved no one came to investigate. Can you imagine? Yikes! Well, I ended up with some lovely bruises, swelling, and some damaged ligaments.
Still, I need to get walking again. I know how much it helps me in all health aspects-mental and physical.
I also need to go on a TV diet. Not really sure what that will look like.
Here's my cheerful story for the week. After a lovely but tiring week in Houston for work, I was queuing up for the flight home when one of my co-workers said he'd been updgraded to First Class and offered me his seat! Who does that? My friend Derek.
In other news, I'm not cut out for diet pills. I tried Phentermine for about a month and a half and, to be honest, I'd rather be fat and happy than feel sick all the time. Not stomach sick, but kind of sinus pressure-y-just-not-myself sick. I may try to use it on the weekends only and see how I feel. My diet plan is to be sensible, eat right, and be moderate. Easier to write than to do.
My newest knee was nearly ready to exercise, then I took a little tumble at Leadership in Houston earlier this month. Picture this: I had taken about five steps into the hallway outside of my hotel room when my shoe caught on the carpet and I pitched forward. I did one of those take-a-few-more-steps dances, then landed face first like I was sliding into home. No one was in the hall, so I tried to stand up before anyone saw me. At that point I realized I wasn't going to be able to stand without some sort of support, so I rolled to a stranger's door and grabbed it to pull myself up. The door handle sure jiggled--I was relieved no one came to investigate. Can you imagine? Yikes! Well, I ended up with some lovely bruises, swelling, and some damaged ligaments.
Still, I need to get walking again. I know how much it helps me in all health aspects-mental and physical.
I also need to go on a TV diet. Not really sure what that will look like.
Tuesday, November 26, 2013
282.6: A hop across the pond
Hiyer! It's been a crazy month - we hosted the Rising Stars here at the office and I've been to England and back since last I wrote. It was wonderful--Stampin' Up! convention in Manchester.
I wish I had an earth shattering update regarding dieting. I don't. I am working with my doctor to see if I can find a way to suppress my appetite long enough to make better food decisions, but I've been travelling or had such an odd schedule for the past three weeks that I don't know if the pills are really doing anything. We'll see. Maybe once I get over jet lag and back into a routine? Wait! It's Thanksgiving in two days, then I fly to Washington DC for a conference. So much for a routine, huh?
The best thing I can report is I walked all over Manchester and didn't have achey knees every night. As a matter of fact, my calves hurt from walking so much. It's been years since I've been able to be active enough to have sore calves...yay!
I wish I had an earth shattering update regarding dieting. I don't. I am working with my doctor to see if I can find a way to suppress my appetite long enough to make better food decisions, but I've been travelling or had such an odd schedule for the past three weeks that I don't know if the pills are really doing anything. We'll see. Maybe once I get over jet lag and back into a routine? Wait! It's Thanksgiving in two days, then I fly to Washington DC for a conference. So much for a routine, huh?
The best thing I can report is I walked all over Manchester and didn't have achey knees every night. As a matter of fact, my calves hurt from walking so much. It's been years since I've been able to be active enough to have sore calves...yay!
Monday, October 7, 2013
280.4: Self Mastery or Self Acceptance?
Not surprisingly, I've had a bit of a food binge. In some ways there's too much food to choose from. Weird, huh? Once I quit putting foods in the 'no' category, I got a bit carried away. No tracking. Lots of snacking.
I'm searching, searching, searching. And eating, eating, eating. I don't know what I'm searching for. Sorry for getting all transcendental on you, but if I wait til I get it figured out I may never post again.
Something I've been thinking about is my purpose in life and how to accept and honor who I am while at the same time pushing myself to be more.
Tricky.
I'm searching, searching, searching. And eating, eating, eating. I don't know what I'm searching for. Sorry for getting all transcendental on you, but if I wait til I get it figured out I may never post again.
Something I've been thinking about is my purpose in life and how to accept and honor who I am while at the same time pushing myself to be more.
Tricky.
Monday, September 9, 2013
?: Bonnie is Rebooting
Be patient, this may take some time. The rebooting, that is.
After my last emotional blog post, I had an equally emotional week. And weekend. Early in the week I told my friend Cori "I want to eat all day." And I did. All day, all night, all weekend. I ate carb-filled food. I craved potatoes, bread, chips, chocolate. I ate nachos three times a day one day. I ate frosting from the can. It's not really that good, but it was sweet. I had popcorn with butter an average of once per day (twice on Sunday). Nary a vegetable nor fruit crossed my lips. I had access to both. Tomatoes from my garden, apples from my neighbor's, salad mix from the store. Cucumbers. Peppers. Healthy things spoiled in my refrigerator while I foraged for something to fill up my emotional hole.
Emotional holes can't get filled by food.
My sweet niece Jennie shared this thought from a talk by Richard G Scott, an LDS church leader, with me:
Regardless of religion, this thought contains truth. I need to get back to simple, consistent, good habits.
Today I ate fresh vegetables. Lots of them. I like vegetables and can consistently eat them.
I love how I feel today. I love who I am today.
That's a start, right?
And, by the way, thank you for your support. Blogging really does help me--because you take the time to read and to care. I genuinely appreciate you.
After my last emotional blog post, I had an equally emotional week. And weekend. Early in the week I told my friend Cori "I want to eat all day." And I did. All day, all night, all weekend. I ate carb-filled food. I craved potatoes, bread, chips, chocolate. I ate nachos three times a day one day. I ate frosting from the can. It's not really that good, but it was sweet. I had popcorn with butter an average of once per day (twice on Sunday). Nary a vegetable nor fruit crossed my lips. I had access to both. Tomatoes from my garden, apples from my neighbor's, salad mix from the store. Cucumbers. Peppers. Healthy things spoiled in my refrigerator while I foraged for something to fill up my emotional hole.
Emotional holes can't get filled by food.
My sweet niece Jennie shared this thought from a talk by Richard G Scott, an LDS church leader, with me:
"Simple, consistent, good habits lead to a life full of bountiful blessings.
We can learn, grow and become like Him one consistent step at a time."
Regardless of religion, this thought contains truth. I need to get back to simple, consistent, good habits.
Today I ate fresh vegetables. Lots of them. I like vegetables and can consistently eat them.
I love how I feel today. I love who I am today.
That's a start, right?
And, by the way, thank you for your support. Blogging really does help me--because you take the time to read and to care. I genuinely appreciate you.
Tuesday, September 3, 2013
277: I'm Gonna Have to Re-think This...
Of course, I partied all weekend. I went to three movies, watched a ton of television, sat around and ate. Movie popcorn with extra butter, chocolate covered cinnamon bears, pizza, nachos...and I didn't track anything.
That's my quick update. I had breakfast today at 8:00 and haven't decided whether I'm Medifasting or FastDieting.
In my experience, I am successful on a specific diet program the first time I do it. When I return to it, I'm not as successful. I think that's because I've figured out how to 'bend' the rules and still lose. With that attitude and approach, I don't know if I can Medifast...but I have a bunch of Medifast food. Oh, and I like how I feel on it. Oh, and it's easy to follow.
I just don't know which direction to turn. I want to be healthy so my body doesn't ache all the time. I want to be healthy because I'm worth it.
I'm stressed today. Sorry to be a downer. I just don't believe in myself right now as far as making good food choices. That makes me sad. I'm a good person and I deserve to be a better friend to myself.
Harrumph. Sigh.
That's my quick update. I had breakfast today at 8:00 and haven't decided whether I'm Medifasting or FastDieting.
In my experience, I am successful on a specific diet program the first time I do it. When I return to it, I'm not as successful. I think that's because I've figured out how to 'bend' the rules and still lose. With that attitude and approach, I don't know if I can Medifast...but I have a bunch of Medifast food. Oh, and I like how I feel on it. Oh, and it's easy to follow.
I just don't know which direction to turn. I want to be healthy so my body doesn't ache all the time. I want to be healthy because I'm worth it.
I'm stressed today. Sorry to be a downer. I just don't believe in myself right now as far as making good food choices. That makes me sad. I'm a good person and I deserve to be a better friend to myself.
Harrumph. Sigh.
Wednesday, August 28, 2013
273.0: Not That Fast-Thoughts at Noon
I'm posting during lunch today because I'm fasting. I'm not laughing, relaxing, de-stressing with my friends. I'm drinking 5 calorie broth and updating my blog. Kinda grumpy about that--I'll be honest.
The Friday fast ended well. I did go to dinner with friends, but I had a broth based chicken posole soup and a side salad. I also had several bites of a flourless chocolate cake. Still, the day ended well and I had lost a couple of pounds when I weighed on Saturday morning.
Saturday went fairly well with food except I grazed all day. You ever have those days? Not a huge problem with calories, but I felt food was managing me instead of the other way around. Still, not too bad. I decided after my dinner to begin my next fast. That was 8:30 p.m.
So I fasted from 8:30 p.m 'til after church at 12:30 p.m. which gave me 16 hours of no food. The goal is 12 hours or longer and it's okay to combine sleeping hours to achieve that. At 12:30 I ate 200 calories of a caprese salad (tomatoes, basil and fresh mozzarela cheese). At 1:30 I ate another 200 calories of garlic toast and peanuts. At 4:00 I ate 130 calories of popcorn, unbuttered and tasteless. At 9:00 p.m. I thought I was going to die, so I went to bed. By 10:00 p.m. I had eaten about 700 calories of tomatoes on toast, mixed nuts, peanut butter and chocolate chips. REALLY. Not a successful fastdiet day.
Today I'm following the original plan. I had a 100 calorie breakfast at 7:30 and plan to eat a 400 calorie dinner at 7:30 tonight. I'm looking forward to it--spaghetti casserole, cottage cheese and garlic bread. Yum, huh? We'll see how the rest of the night goes. I'm hoping a later dinner will combat the 'go to bed muchies' that I fought on Sunday.
The spaghetti casserole is a Paula Deen recipe. Here's the link:
http://thedeenbros.com/index.php/recipes/recipe_detail/mamas_spaghetti_casserole_with_baked_garlic_herb_bread/
Here's a picture:
This is my last FastDiet day for the week. For the rest of the week I'm committed to 1) drink 132 ounces of water, 2) track my food, 3) eat 4/5 veggies or fruit and 4) make a plan for every day.
Hope you're well! Thanks for following...
The Friday fast ended well. I did go to dinner with friends, but I had a broth based chicken posole soup and a side salad. I also had several bites of a flourless chocolate cake. Still, the day ended well and I had lost a couple of pounds when I weighed on Saturday morning.
Saturday went fairly well with food except I grazed all day. You ever have those days? Not a huge problem with calories, but I felt food was managing me instead of the other way around. Still, not too bad. I decided after my dinner to begin my next fast. That was 8:30 p.m.
So I fasted from 8:30 p.m 'til after church at 12:30 p.m. which gave me 16 hours of no food. The goal is 12 hours or longer and it's okay to combine sleeping hours to achieve that. At 12:30 I ate 200 calories of a caprese salad (tomatoes, basil and fresh mozzarela cheese). At 1:30 I ate another 200 calories of garlic toast and peanuts. At 4:00 I ate 130 calories of popcorn, unbuttered and tasteless. At 9:00 p.m. I thought I was going to die, so I went to bed. By 10:00 p.m. I had eaten about 700 calories of tomatoes on toast, mixed nuts, peanut butter and chocolate chips. REALLY. Not a successful fastdiet day.
Today I'm following the original plan. I had a 100 calorie breakfast at 7:30 and plan to eat a 400 calorie dinner at 7:30 tonight. I'm looking forward to it--spaghetti casserole, cottage cheese and garlic bread. Yum, huh? We'll see how the rest of the night goes. I'm hoping a later dinner will combat the 'go to bed muchies' that I fought on Sunday.
The spaghetti casserole is a Paula Deen recipe. Here's the link:
http://thedeenbros.com/index.php/recipes/recipe_detail/mamas_spaghetti_casserole_with_baked_garlic_herb_bread/
Here's a picture:
This is my last FastDiet day for the week. For the rest of the week I'm committed to 1) drink 132 ounces of water, 2) track my food, 3) eat 4/5 veggies or fruit and 4) make a plan for every day.
Hope you're well! Thanks for following...
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