Thursday, October 14, 2010

#28 & #29: Back on track and on the road again

I'm cheating a smidge here because I forgot to post my brief but timely entry from Monday. So, I'm just adding my Thursday post to the Monday one (which is really last Sunday's post). Lost anyone? If you even still care, read on!

Monday's post:
Hi all y'all! Columbia was sooo wonderful! The demonstrators from that area are so gracious and were truly lovely. We stayed in a great hotel and kind of had a low key weekend-much needed for my body and soul. The only downside is I didn't get to see my sweet niece Jennie who is raising her family in that area.

I lost 5.5 of the 6 pounds I gained last week! I am so glad. I worked very hard at it and believe me, I totally wanted to turn to food several times.

Another trip this weekend-St. John's Newfoundland. More later!

Thursday's post:
It's bright and early, but I want to post before I fly out. It's going to be a long travel day-8:45 a.m. to midnight. I'm taking snacks and think I'll have time for dinner in the Toronto airport, so I should be good.

So, my therapy session last Monday was intense. I felt almost ill going in to see Kaleo, but I really feel an urgency to make good use of my time with her so I pushed through. I feel hopeful and frightened at the same time. I think I'm afraid to put myself out there on the dating scene. Food hasn't met all my needs, but it's been pretty reliable. Being overweight has insulated me from taking risks and possibly being hurt again (a series of failed romances during college and just after). It sounds so melodramatic as I type this. I realize the failed relationships from my late 20's are part of my history and that I have since gained a lifetime of experience and skills that will help me face the positives and negatives of relationships. I just get tired even thinking about it. Kaleo told me I don't have to focus on that too much right now, so I'm just putting it on the table and looking at it every once in a while.

I guess I'll have plenty of plane time to process this mess.

My sweet niece Tamsin and my grand niece Emma left Salt Lake yesterday to move to Arizona. I'm going to miss having them so close. Big hole.

I want a donut-the chocolate ones at the gas station. Or chips. Maybe both.

1 comment:

  1. Did you get the donut? Or did you talk yourself out of it? I'm rooting for you! I appreciate your honesty and candor. YOu give me strength to fight my own food battles. (BTW EVERYTIME I got to SLC for convention, I come home from Dunford Bakery with Bread and 2 boxes of chocolate donuts. My 6 kids *who don't have weight issues* don't get much sugar, but if they are 'good' while I'm away, get those for treats along with the hotel shampoos and lotions and pens etc.)