255.6: 30 Pound Benchmark

30 pounds in 6.5 weeks! What? I am flying sooo high today!

I've spent the past two days sleeping, eating, recovering from convention and drinking tons of water. Tons. I think that's key right now. When I keep myself hydrated, I stay on track.

There's so much weight ahead of me to lose. I rejoice in what I've done, but I have to stay focused on my end goal. I am morbidly obese (I really hate that designation, but it's accurate) and in danger of a myriad of diseases, strokes or heart problems. I feel so much better now. I can't imagine what another 20, 40 or 60 pound loss will feel like--but I'm gonna find out. Yippykiyay!

I have to take up this cross every single day. No resting on my laurels--even if they're smaller now than they were 6 weeks ago.

259.4: Final, Fifty, and Food Fotos (see what I did there?)

I was able to sleep in 'til 8. Way in compared to the 6 a.m. mornings this week. It was lovely! Ronda and Tami taught our class two more times. The attendees were so enthusiastic! It was a great way to end our portion of convention. After lunch we had our final session which was wonderful--filled with surprises, stamping and fun. For the first time, we streamed a part of convention. We wanted to try out the system we hope to use more in the future, and since our 2014 incentive trip is global, we thought this was a good time to try it out. We included Sara Douglass' (Shelli Gardner's daughter) stamping presentation as part of the streaming.

I had to dash as soon as the session was over. Anita, my bestie, turned 50 today. I had collected fifty greetings from friends old and new and attached them to fifty balloons. We had a fabulous dinner at Alyson's house, then I came home to crash and wrap up my day.

I took photos of my non-Medifast convention nibbles. Here you go:

Lunch was sliders--so I had a bit of brat, chicken and hamburger. I also had three potato chips, 1 tablespoon of potato salad, and some green salad with dressing. Pretty good Lean and Green/

A bit of pizza from the Gardner Green room. I ate it before I took a picture, so I had to get a second piece and have Sara Douglass hold it while I took the photo. Bad pic, but evidence.

Shannon had cinnamon bears and chocolate. I had this 3x but will only show you one picture!

259.8: A Mini Meltdown

True confession: I weighed twice. The first time was 260.4, but I refused to believe it. So I weighed again and didn't go for a third as a confirmation. Silly behavior!

I was 'off' this morning. I slept well last night, so I felt rested but just 'off.' I hemmed a new pair of pants last night, ironed them, then finally put them on this morning to discover they were quite snug. Put my contacts in and found a rip in my contact.

Nothing too life shattering, right?

I presented this morning. What does that mean? In a nutshell, I had 25 minutes to show six projects and help 3400 Stampin' Up! demonstrators see what great things they can make with our products. I love presenting. I love stamping. No problem, right? Wrong. I was on hormone overdrive (both the monthly and the menopausal kind) and felt more and more inadequate as the morning wore on.

The demonstrator response was positive--of course if they didn't like me, they wouldn't come up and tell me! It's ironic that the most consistent comment is, "You are just so funny." I didn't feel too funny most of the morning. What if, all of a sudden, the funny leaves or goes out of style? What if my funny overshadows the stamping? I genuinely love the Stampin' Up! staff and demonstrators and would be very sad to let them down. I know, of course, not every person's going to like me. I just feel like it's my job to be the best I can be at an event, and this morning the fatigue and stress caught up with me.

What a lot of emotion. It's exhausting sometimes. I share my experience because I know I'm not the only one who goes through bouts of self doubt and feelings of inadequacy.

How did this translate in terms of dieting? I actually did fairly well, but my literal and physical gut says I ate more than I'm admitting to. Tomorrow I plan to take pictures of every non Medifast food item I eat...

261.8

I got on the scale twice. Arghh. Still, weighing every day brings ups and downs. Today was the best food and water day this week, so we'll see what tomorrow's scale visit brings.
It was a great day. Our opening session was off the charts--the opening video is amazing! Let's see if I'm smart enough to link to it...http://www.youtube.com/embed/IwIAyuyE1KY

I'll be surprised if that works--doesn't look right, but it took me twenty minutes to even try. Go to YouTube and search for Stampin' Up! convention video. It was a blast to be part of!

We had two classes today. All I do is kind of host the class. Ronda Wade and Tami White are sharing tips about how they run their SU businesses. They did a great job. I dashed to Memento Mall during lunch and to help for a bit, but I didn't last long. After our afternoon class, I got dolled up and joined Holly Linford for a duet. Don't know how good we sounded, but it was very fun. Dinner, then Awards Night.

Love my job; love convention!

261: Convention Check In Day

The scale wasn't kind this morning but I'm okay with it. Today was a busy, busy, busy day. Did I say busy? Cuz it was. Lots of behind the scenes work; class rehearsals, setting up for night stamping classes, hugging friends, smiling at friends-to-be, and preparing for classes tomorrow. I'm tuckered out!
It was easy to stay on my Medifast program today. I did have two potato chips with bacon dip at lunch, but otherwise I was happy with my Medifast food. For dinner I had salmon, roasted veggies, and caprese salad. I'm certain mozzarella isn't on my list of Lean and Green right now...and the salmon and veggies were prepared with some oil or butter, but overall I'm feeling okay both physically and emotionally. I also forgot to eat my 3:00 meal until nearly 4:30. I was just...busy.

The most amazing part of today was all the supportive friends who commented on my progress and efforts. I am feeling so motivated by their encouragement! That social support means so much to me...especially from friends who are on the same journey. Jennifer--you started it all and made my day. Really and truly.

Okay, I'm ready to hit the hay. I've got more chapters in The Game of Thrones to read before I close my eyes. I'm kind of eager to see the scale in the morning--lots of dashing to and fro today (doesn't that count as exercise?).

259.8: Convention Tuesday

Love that number! Happy dance and squeal of delight!

Today was rehearsal day for convention, so I was at the Salt Palace from 8:00 'til 5:00. I was able to stick to the Medifast program quite well during the day, then I began to crumble once I got home. I think it was a case of falling back into old habits--I 'deserved' a treat because I'd been 'good' all day. Anyway, I stopped for a chicken kabob to get my protein for the day (I had salad for lunch, but very little meat)...next thing I know I have ordered fries also. I ate both chicken kabobs (should have stopped at one), seven fries, 14 M&Ms and seven Hot Tamales, and six roasted almonds. Arghh. I currently feel yuck-o. Heartburn. Letdown.

I plan to write every day this week.

263.4 The Many Faces of Support

I've decided to start every title with my current weight. :)

I drove to Logan on Friday to visit my nephews and their families who were here for the 4th of July. It was so much fun to see them. I packed a cooler with ice, water and celery stalks so I could make my shakes and stay on track. Did quite well until we went to a pizza/pasta buffet for dinner. I didn't eat pasta or pizza crusts, but my protein was mostly cheese and fat laden processed meats like pepperoni, ham and sausage. Not the best, but it could have been worse. Jessica and Lyndsay were so supportive of me and my progress. Thanks gals! My sister Annette has been cheerleading me all the way. I swear she's as excited as I am about my success.

My friends Cathi, Anita and Rosann are super supportive. I feel lucky to have such good friends. They are the first to give me a holla or a woot woot when I text my progress. I also belong to a Facebook group of Stampin' Up! related friends who are working on losing weight. Reading about their daily struggles keeps me going.

I had the best talk with Medifast Mary www.marylange.tsfl.com yesterday. As I shared my nibbling, she helped me see that even noshing on benign things like tomatoes and zucchini can sabotage my efforts. My body needs to tap into its fat stores for the extra calories I'm not eating and it will only do that if I stick with the diet. When I eat extra food I keep my body from operating efficiently. Her words: If you modify the program, you modify the results. So I'm sticking with the fairly straightforward Lean & Green recipes she gave me.

It takes a village for Bonnie to lose weight. Good thing I have one!

20 pounds in 4 Weeks. I Wouldn't Lie to You!

I did a happy dance when the scale read 265.8 this morning. I've been playing with the same 2-3 pounds for the past 10 days. I kept praying to just see 266.anything--I would have celebrated. So to skip that number completely makes me super-dee-duper happy. It's just a number, but one I'm hoping not to see again.

By the way last time I weighed 265 was April of 2001.  

My week 4 weigh in is tomorrow. I really can't believe it's been a month. Has it? I'm hoping to hit my twenty pound down mark. If I don't, that's okay too. Can you tell I'm talking myself into that?

The last weekend was hard for me. I didn't manage my nibbling very well. I wasn't munching on nachos or chocolate, but I couldn't stop picking at pickles, celery, walnuts, tomatoes and fresh mozzarella, olives, zucchini chips, kale chips.... Got the idea? I can have three celery stalks or two pickle spears or 8 olives or 10 walnut halves a day--but not all on the same day! I also ate from emotions instead of hunger. I was stressed, bored, overwhelmed and lonely all mixed up in a casserole of crazy.

Here's what I learned. No matter how delicious the photo of zucchini chips looks, they're not worth the time. They end up tasting quite good, but it seriously takes 4 hours to make chips from one zucchini--and they end up the size of a nickle. Kale, on the other hand, takes 10 minutes on 350 and is tasty. I wouldn't call 'em chips, but crunchy bits of veg with some season salt. Not too bad.

I think I'm being a bit of a loner right now. It's hard to balance eating at friends' or going to lunch and  testing my self control and I just don't want to put myself in a hard situation. I think that will get better. I hope so! On Thursday I joined some old friends for a late lunch/early dinner. I found myself feeling a bit bitter as I watched them eating pizza. I was sooo hungry. Okay, I wanted pizza soooo much. I should have just brought my own lean and green food. These friends would have totally supported me. Duh!