Friday, November 12, 2010

#36: The Fat Me (an assignment)

Good morning! For today's post, I want to share an assignment from chapter 10 of Breaking Free From Emotional Eating.

Who is the fat you? What does she do? How does she feel? What does she need?

The fat me is happy, gregarious and funny. She has a great job, a darling bungalow and an amazing support group. She isn't married and hasn't dated seriously for at least nine years. She wears stylish clothing, but her priority is that it be loose and comfortable. She wears little make up. She's low maintenance. She looks in the mirror at the beginning of the day to get ready, then rarely thinks about how she looks. She uses a full length mirror occasionally, but denies intentionally avoiding it.

The fat me does pretty much the same thing every day. She wakes up around 6:30 and leaves for work around 7:15. Some mornings she works out at Curves. She arrives home between 6:30 and 7:00, then eats dinner while watching television. Some week nights she attends church functions or tends her best friend's little boys. She values her alone time, but is usually up for an impromptu party. Most weekends the fat me combines a mixture of housework (very little), watching television, stamping, tending the boys, or hanging out with her family or friends. She loves to read and watch movies at home. She enjoys cooking sometimes. She loves to go for walks, but doesn't do it much because her knees hurt.

When the fat me travels (which she's done a lot of lately), she takes a seat belt extender. She has to psyche herself up with each new flight because she doesn't know if the plane's seat belt will fit. She never uses the tray table because it won't go all the way down and she doesn't want to call attention to that. She tries to be invisible so the passenger next to her doesn't feel squished and anytime she has an empty seat between her and the other passengers on her row she thanks the universe.

The fat me tries to avoid feeling. She uses food to keep herself on an even keel, feeling like she might not have the energy, skills or desire to deal with her emotions. She doesn't realize how frequently she thinks poorly of herself and how infrequently she feels proud of herself. She is trying, though.

The fat me doesn't have too many needs because wanting what she doesn't have scares her or she doesn't feel she deserves more than what she has. She has been raised to be content with whatever she's been given. Basically, she needs a mixture of alone time and time with family and friends. She needs enough money to not worry about it all the time. She needs good medical care and the financial means to take care of herself. She needs a husband, but doesn't admit that to herself.

There you go. I'm happy to have finished this assignment and now I'm going to give myself some praise for doing so!


  1. Bonnie, sending you hugs....


  2. wow that's some assignment ..... well done sweetheart .... made me feel very sad though ... I am looking forward to some more good news from you - you are doing sooooo well :)